Beautifully worded. My heart aches for all of the princesses who have been silenced by patriarchy, in and out of religious institutions for far too long.
It feels like a misuse of the atonement in that quote. If something is right for a woman to have, right enough to be restored by the atonement, then the church should do whatever it can here and now to restore it. We know Joseph Smith restored the priesthood to women. We know there were female prophets, apostles and deaconesses in the New Testament. There's nothing stopped the church from doing right by women but traditional patriarchal religion.
I wanna be in the land where all the women have hot wired their cars and are driving and enjoying their freedom and the open roads!! Loved this story, Stephanie. I also appreciate the somewhat snarky use of the word asymmetry. I still cannot believe that the leaders through God under the bus like this…
WOW! Love this! What a clear and powerful articulation of the “benevolent” patriarchy and nonsensical dialogue surrounding women and the priesthood in the Mormon church. Thank you for this!
As a man I tried to share the keys with my, then wife. We both put our hands on our son and gave him a blessing. But I'll admit that was a hard thing to do. It felt wrong then. But woman , bless your babies if you want. Heal the sick if you want. Use the power of Jesus or faith or the self ordained priesthood. They won't let you at church but the gosple can be lived very fully at home. I'd love to hear stories of woman baptizing their kids in private or ordaining other woman.
Yes, my husband and I have started blessing our children together and I have blessed my daughter, but it has felt weird. I think more women are realizing that they don’t need permission to use the power within them.
This parable is absolutely brilliant, Stephenie. The car metaphor cuts right through all the theological gymnastics and gets to the heart of the matter - what good is "access" to power when you don't actually hold the keys?
The line that hit me hardest: "Power or platitudes?" That encapsulates everything. The endless word games about "different but equal" and "asymmetry" (seriously, when did inequality get such a fancy rebrand?) while the actual lived experience is limitation and exclusion.
I love how you show the princess's evolution - from accepting the gaslighting about "inherent power" and "implied crowns" to finally realizing she could hotwire her own damn car. The image of her adjusting the seat and mirrors for the first time because she's finally seeing the world from the driver's seat is so powerful.
The brother's internal monologue is painfully honest too. That fear of losing status if equality actually happens - the quiet part said out loud. His choice to maintain the status quo rather than advocate for his sister rings so true.
And footnote 3 about Elder Renlund calling it "asymmetry" - the euphemism treadmill never stops, does it? As if calling inequality by a more clinical name makes it more palatable. "Any unfairness will be made right through the Atonement" is such a cop-out. Why not just... make it right now?
The ending gives me hope though. Sometimes the only way forward is to stop waiting for permission and start the engine yourself. Thank you for this - it's going to stick with me.
Thank you Brittney for your thoughts and kind words! 💛
I was watching these expensive muscle cars loudly parade up a 25 mph street while on vacation in CA and I thought: What is the point of having such an expensive fast car when the speed limit is 25 mph and the traffic is horrendous? And then I thought how this was reflective of my life and the words just came.
My husband reminded me of that movie, "The Truman Show" where he lives in a tightly controlled world until he learns that it was a lie. When you realize that Patriarchy, especially the priesthood, subjugates women, you can't unsee it and you must get the keys to the car and drive like the wind.
Patriarchy has been a hard pill to swallow, especially when you see it’s a system set up for men to have power at women’s expense, but your whole life you were led to believe it was a system of love.☹️
I wanna be in the land where all the women have hot wired their cars and are driving and enjoying their freedom and the open roads!! Loved this story, Stephanie
Beautifully worded. My heart aches for all of the princesses who have been silenced by patriarchy, in and out of religious institutions for far too long.
The silencing has been hard, but sometimes so is the speaking out☹️ It’s a never ending battle.
Here's to hotwiring and taking the power yourself!!
Amen!
It feels like a misuse of the atonement in that quote. If something is right for a woman to have, right enough to be restored by the atonement, then the church should do whatever it can here and now to restore it. We know Joseph Smith restored the priesthood to women. We know there were female prophets, apostles and deaconesses in the New Testament. There's nothing stopped the church from doing right by women but traditional patriarchal religion.
Yes, a lot of our practices are far from “restorative.”
I wanna be in the land where all the women have hot wired their cars and are driving and enjoying their freedom and the open roads!! Loved this story, Stephanie. I also appreciate the somewhat snarky use of the word asymmetry. I still cannot believe that the leaders through God under the bus like this…
Freedom on open and “symmetrical” roads.😊
Exactly
WOW! Love this! What a clear and powerful articulation of the “benevolent” patriarchy and nonsensical dialogue surrounding women and the priesthood in the Mormon church. Thank you for this!
Yes, it’s a lot of doublespeak and so contradictory.
Yaaaaaas. I have a blog post coming oit this Thursday about my first “drive” after God showed me how to hotwire my car. Great analogy, thank you!
Can’t wait to read it, as there are so many unique and individual ways to hotwire a car😁
Amazing analogy! I loved it!
Thanks Terri!
Dang, Stephenie. NAILED. 👏🏻 IT. 👏🏻 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Thanks!!
As a man I tried to share the keys with my, then wife. We both put our hands on our son and gave him a blessing. But I'll admit that was a hard thing to do. It felt wrong then. But woman , bless your babies if you want. Heal the sick if you want. Use the power of Jesus or faith or the self ordained priesthood. They won't let you at church but the gosple can be lived very fully at home. I'd love to hear stories of woman baptizing their kids in private or ordaining other woman.
Yes, my husband and I have started blessing our children together and I have blessed my daughter, but it has felt weird. I think more women are realizing that they don’t need permission to use the power within them.
This parable is absolutely brilliant, Stephenie. The car metaphor cuts right through all the theological gymnastics and gets to the heart of the matter - what good is "access" to power when you don't actually hold the keys?
The line that hit me hardest: "Power or platitudes?" That encapsulates everything. The endless word games about "different but equal" and "asymmetry" (seriously, when did inequality get such a fancy rebrand?) while the actual lived experience is limitation and exclusion.
I love how you show the princess's evolution - from accepting the gaslighting about "inherent power" and "implied crowns" to finally realizing she could hotwire her own damn car. The image of her adjusting the seat and mirrors for the first time because she's finally seeing the world from the driver's seat is so powerful.
The brother's internal monologue is painfully honest too. That fear of losing status if equality actually happens - the quiet part said out loud. His choice to maintain the status quo rather than advocate for his sister rings so true.
And footnote 3 about Elder Renlund calling it "asymmetry" - the euphemism treadmill never stops, does it? As if calling inequality by a more clinical name makes it more palatable. "Any unfairness will be made right through the Atonement" is such a cop-out. Why not just... make it right now?
The ending gives me hope though. Sometimes the only way forward is to stop waiting for permission and start the engine yourself. Thank you for this - it's going to stick with me.
Thank you Brittney for your thoughts and kind words! 💛
I was watching these expensive muscle cars loudly parade up a 25 mph street while on vacation in CA and I thought: What is the point of having such an expensive fast car when the speed limit is 25 mph and the traffic is horrendous? And then I thought how this was reflective of my life and the words just came.
Loved your story! I want to imagine the world your princess would create 🥰
I can’t help but think it would be light years ahead of the world we live in now…
My husband reminded me of that movie, "The Truman Show" where he lives in a tightly controlled world until he learns that it was a lie. When you realize that Patriarchy, especially the priesthood, subjugates women, you can't unsee it and you must get the keys to the car and drive like the wind.
Patriarchy has been a hard pill to swallow, especially when you see it’s a system set up for men to have power at women’s expense, but your whole life you were led to believe it was a system of love.☹️
I wanna be in the land where all the women have hot wired their cars and are driving and enjoying their freedom and the open roads!! Loved this story, Stephanie